Mouthing Off
by 51Dreaming
Summary: Johnny bites off a bit more than he can chew.


**Mouthing Off**

Johnny, Roy, Marco, Chet, Mike, and Cap are owned exclusively by Mark Vii and Universal Sudios. No Copyright infringement is intended.

To anyone who is afraid of something

**Chapter One**

Roy DeSoto had just finished changing into his uniform when Johnny Gage dragged into the locker room. He sighed, opened his locker, and tossed in his jacket.

"Johnny, I'm telling you, it's going to be okay. It's no big deal."

Johnny shook his head. "Well, it is to me. I didn't sleep all night."  
"I know. You called me three times."

Chet Kelly arrived at the locker room, took one look at Johnny, and grinned. "Another dating crisis, Gage?"

"Chet, shut up."

Roy took Chet's arm and led him into the bay. "Look, Chet...Johnny is going to have a medical procedure...he's kinda nervous about it. So lay off, would ya?"

Chet's face fell. "Oh man, I didn't know."

"Yeah, and he - " Chet ran back into the locker room.

"Doesn't want to talk about it." Roy gulped and took off after Chet.

Too late. Chet was already badgering Johnny with his special form of sympathy.

"Come on Gage, what kind of procedure is it? You'll feel better if you talk about it, Pal."

Johnny glared at Roy, then turned to Chet. "Chet, I don't want to talk about it!"

"Don't want to talk about what? Johnny, are you okay?" Cap. Hot on his heels were Marco and Mike.

"What's wrong with Johnny? He's all sweaty...what do you guys call it?" asked Marco.

"Diaphoretic," snapped Johnny. "Can't a guy have any privacy around here?"

"John, I think you'd better tell us," said Cap. He placed an arm around Johnny's shoulder and gave him a friendly squeeze. "We're all friends, here."

Johnny threw Roy a helpless look. Roy shrugged his shoulders and turned away to hide the grin that took over his face. Johnny shrugged off Cap's arm.

"Okay, okay...I need a dental procedure...never had one before...I'm just a bit nervous, okay?"

Chet looked disappointed. "That's it? What are you having..extractions? Root canal?"

"I had a bone graft once. Hurt like hell," Mike contributed.

Roy's shoulders began to shake. "Might as well tell them, Johnny."

Johnny dropped onto the bench, and held his head in his hands. "Just what I need. All you clowns on my back all day. Look, if I tell you, can we just drop it?"

The crew nodded gravely.

"I have a cavity. Satisfied?"

Cap guffawed, then caught himself. "I'm sorry, John. It's just...with your medical history...you know...I'll see you at roll call..." He fled the room.

"A CAVITY? Big deal." Mike snorted, as he headed toward his locker. Marco followed. "Geez, I thought it was something big...a cavity..."

Chet leaned against Johnny's locker, grinning at him. "Do you MIND?" Johnny shoved him aside and started changing. "Don't you have anything better to do?"

"Not really, no. So uh, you're scared of the dentist, Gage? Is it the drill and the way it goes 'ZZZZZZZZZZ?' Or the needles, maybe? Man, wait till you see them. They're longer than anything you guys use."

"Okay Chet, that's enough." Roy gently pushed Chet out the door. Johnny continued dressing.

"Sorry about that."

"Yeah, big help you've been."

"Johnny, like I told you last night, my KIDS get cavities. I get cavities. Joanne, everyone here, probably everyone you know. That's why no one is upset about it. Cavities are a part of life.

Johnny slammed his locker door. "Yeah, like car wrecks. How about we just...don't talk about it any more?"

"Okay, fine." Roy finished lacing his boots. "Whatever you want."

"Roll call!" Cap yelled from the bay.

"Yeah, that's what I want," Johnny grumbled as he left the locker room.

**Chapter Two**

Two days later, Chet was changing out of his civvies when Marco strolled in.

"Hey, Marco. See the game last night?"

"Oh, yeah. Great game, especially the last quarter."

Mike strode in. "Talking about the game?"

"Yeah, wasn't it fantastic?"

Cap arrived. "The game? Man, I won five bucks in a pool on that baby."

Roy strolled in.

"That's great, Cap. Hey Roy, ya see the game yesterday?"

"Uh, what game?"

"What game? You're kidding."

"Oh, football. I don't follow it. I usually take the kids to the park on Sundays."

Chet guffawed.

Johnny arrived. "Johnny, you saw the game. Wasn't it great?"

"Game? Yeah uh, great. Great game." He took off his jacket and hung it up. Marco, Chet, Mike, and Cap scattered, leaving Roy shaking his head at Johnny.

"Still didn't go, huh."

"Well, I was gonna. I just got to thinking. Maybe he's wrong. The dentist. Maybe he's wrong."

"Oh. Your dentist can't diagnose a simple cavity."

"I'm not sayin' that. Mistakes do happen, ya know...ow."

"Uh huh."

Johnny shrugged. "Besides, what's the worst thing that could happen if I just leave it alone, eat real careful, and brush my teeth a lot?"

"You could lose the tooth, that's what."

"Well, I know THAT! But it's way in the back. No one will notice."

"Wow, Junior. You've really thought this through."

Johnny grinned. "Yeah, I have."

"Ya think about how your mouth will look when the teeth around that hole in your jaw collapse like a row of dominoes?"

Johnny laughed. "Teeth don't do that."

"They do. My dentist has pictures in his office." Roy laced up his boots and patted Johnny on the shoulder. "See ya at roll call, Junior."

Johnny stared at his locker and rubbed his jaw. "Nah..."

Chet stuck his head around the corner. "Like dominoes, Gage. Real popular look with chicks."

**Chapter Three**

That afternoon, Johnny's voice was heard coming from the dorm. He did not sound happy. One by one, the crew crept into the dorm.

"Look, I KNOW that. What's the big deal? So you knock me out. I'll wake up, I'll leave...look, I'll pay extra. No, I don't think I'm overreacting. Fine, I'll just take my business elsewhere. You're not the only dentist in L.A." He slammed the phone. The guys fled into the bay, where they broke up laughing.

"General anesthesia for a cavity!"

"Oh man, I thought he was going to blow his stack."

"Who woulda thought Gage would be such a chicken?"

"You all finished, now? You want me to stay in the dorm so you can laugh some more behind my back?" Johnny stalked across the bay, holding his jaw and wincing. He disappeared into the dayroom. Roy followed him, motioning for the others to remain behind. So of course they crowded into the doorway, listening.

Johnny was seated at the table, his head buried in his arms. Roy took a seat next to him.

"You're really scared."

"Yeah," came a muffled voice. "And the more I think about it, the more scared I get. What am I gonna do?"

"Look, my kids go to a specialist. She's real good with...ya know...frightened kids..." Johnny raised his head and furrowed his brow.

"A pediatric dentist? You want me to see a pediatric dentist?"

Roy nodded solemnly. "She'll calm you down, I swear."

"Well..." Johnny thought a moment, rubbed his jaw. "I gotta do something. She's good, huh?"

"Yeah, she's good."

"Does she...sedate you if you need it?"

"Yep."

"And she won't laugh?"

"Won't laugh. I promise. Want me to call her?"

Johnny sighed. "Yeah, sure. Just...keep your trap shut about it, all right?"

"Okay, Junior. I won't say a word." Roy checked to make sure they were still alone, then went to the pay phone and dialed a number. He spoke quietly, then scribbled a note. He handed the note to Johnny. "Here. Tomorrow at eleven."

Johnny's head dropped back to his arms. "Maybe we'll go on a run tonight and I'll die."

Roy walked toward the door, muttering under his breath. "Kinda wish you would..."

"What?"

"Uh...Carla Sherwood. The dentist. Carla Sherwood."

**Chapter Four**

That night, a form crawled alongside Johnny's bed in the dark dorm. His turnouts were lifted, a paper was pulled out of his pocket. The form shone a light on the paper.

"Hehehe..."

**Chapter Five**

"Okay, the appointment is at eleven. Don't chicken out this time."

"I won't, I won't...geez."

"I just don't want to see you back here in a couple of days with that cavity still bothering you."

"All right, all right. See ya next shift."

Roy stood, arms folded, staring Johnny down.

"WHAT?"

"You're not gonna go, are you?"

"I am, I am...I just gotta go...have a couple of beers first." Johnny tried to slip past Roy, but Roy caught his arm. "Oh no, you don't."

"Hey, let go!"

"Nope. Get in my car." Roy pulled a resisting Johnny to his car, opened the passenger door, and shoved him in.

"Hey, knock it off!" Roy loomed over Johnny.

"You have been driving me crazy for days. You are going to the dentist in three hours and that's it." Johnny opened the door and tried to climb out, but Roy slammed the door, climbed over him and settled into the driver's seat.

"first, we're going to the movies. Then, we're going to the dentist."

"But - "

"Johnny, just shut up and relax. Just...shut up." He started the engine and roared out of the lot.

**Chapter Six**

"No way, man. I'm not doing this. It's just...stupid." Mike Stoker stared at the address Chet handed him and shook his head.

"Chet, I got better things to do than harass John. Besides, I gotta work with the guy and he's already ticked off at me." Marco handed his copy back to Chet.

"Don't look at me. I'm Gage's boss. I don't pull this kind of stunt." Cap crumpled his copy and tossed it in the garbage. "And if you know what's good for you, you'll lay off."

"But - " Chet looked at their retreating backs. "Fine. Miss the fun. I don't need any of you." Chet started changing into his civvies.

Mike stuck his head back in the locker room. "You're really gonna do this?"

"Yeah. You in?"

Mike looked around. "You bet. See you there." He disappeared.

Marco and Cap snuck in, looked at each other, and laughed.

"You guys coming?" Marco nodded. Cap frowned at Chet. I'm only coming to keep things under control, understand?"

"Sure, Cap. Absolutely."

**Chapter Seven**

Johnny took one look around the waiting room, decorated with rainbows, teddy bears, and pictures of happy children, and made a beeline for the door. "Nuh uh. No way, man." Roy caught his arm and pulled him to the receptionist's window. "John Gage to see Dr. Sherwood." The young woman eyed Johnny, squirming in Roy's grasp.

"Is he...all right?"

"He's fine. Just a bit - " Johnny broke free from Roy's grasp and headed toward the door. Roy chased him down and brought him back. "Nervous."

"Okay...Mr. Gage, could you fill out this new patient form? And I'll need your dental insurance card."

Roy took the clipboard from the receptionist. He elbowed Johnny. "Give her your insurance card." Johnny reached a shaking hand into his pocket and pulled out his wallet, which promptly fell on the floor. Roy scooped it up, pulled out Johnny's card and handed it to the receptionist. He shoved Johnny's wallet back into his pocket, dragged him to a seat, and dropped him into it.

"Sit."

Roy began filling out the form. Johnny eyed it.

"Next of kin? NEXT OF KIN?"

"It's just a standard form." Roy grabbed a magazine and dumped it in Johnny's lap. "Here. Read."

"But...this is Highlights...it's a kid's magazine." Roy leaned over and glared at Johnny. "READ!" Johnny slouched down in his seat and opened the magazine.

A door opened and a smiling young woman stepped into the room.

"John Gage?"

Roy hauled Johnny to his feet and pushed him toward the young woman. She smiled hesitantly. "You're John?" Johnny grinned sheepishly. "Yeah, I'm him. How ya doin'?"

"Fine. Would you come with me?"

**Chapter Eight**

"Roy..."

"No."

A beautiful, petite, smiling young woman entered the exam room. "John? I'm Dr. Sherwood. It's nice to meet you." Roy planted a hand on Johnny's shoulder and pushed him into the seat. Johnny shot him a resentful glance.

Dr. Sherwood pulled a chair up to Johnny and smiled at him. Her eyes were the kind a man would kill for.

"So, Roy tells me you're pretty phobic about the dentist. You know how that started?" Johnny shot Roy an even more resentful glance.

"I'm not phobic. I just, uh...don't like the idea of someone...uh...poking around my mouth...ya know...and the pain...ya know..."

Dr. Sherwood smiled again. Under any other circumstance, Johnny would have made a play for her, but with Roy's hand on his shoulder, and all the equipment at her disposal, it didn't seem wise. That, plus the fact that he was drenched in sweat. Not one of his more stellar moments.

"May I have a look? Just a look."

Johnny scrunched his eyes closed and opened his mouth.

"Can you point to the tooth that hurts?"

"Uh, here..." Johnny stuck his fist into his mouth as he reached for the offending tooth.

"Oh, I see. Does it wake you up at night?"

"Well, no, not really..."

"Wakes ME up at night," Roy's voice sounded above Johnny's head. Dr. Sherwood smiled.

"How long has this been bothering you?"

"Oh, not long..." Johnny felt Roy's fingers digging into his shoulder. "About a month."

Dr. Sherwood put a gentle hand on Johnny's arm. John, I think the cavity has spread to a couple of other teeth. I'm so glad you came in. How'd you like it if we fixed this so it won't hurt anymore?" Johnny opened his mouth to say it wasn't necessary, but Roy dug his fingers in even harder.

"Yeah," he squeaked. He shot Roy one more withering look. Roy was smiling triumphantly. He released Johnny's shoulder.

"Dr. Sherwood gazed into Johnny's eyes. "I don't want this to be a scary experience for you, John. How would you feel about some IV sedation? You'll doze through the entire procedure. Then Roy can drive you home. How's that sound?"

"Sure, fine."

"Okay. I'll be back in a minute, and we'll get you sedated." she gave Johnny one more sympathetic look from her doe-like eyes and left the room.

For the first time that day, Johnny cracked a grin.

"Roy...I think she digs me."

**Chapter Nine**

"John? It's Dr. Sherwood. We're all done." Johnny lay oblivious, sedated in the exam chair. Dr. Sherwood patted him on the arm and smiled at Roy.

"So, John is your partner."

"He is. I've never seen him afraid of anything...not like this..."

"Well, everyone is afraid of something..."

"Yeah, I suppose you're right."

"So, how are the kids? And Joanne?"

"Fine, everybody's fine."

"Will you give them my best?"

"Sure."

"Roy...it was awfully kind of you to bring John in. You're a good friend." Roy felt his annoyance at Johnny melting away. "Yeah, well...he'd have done the same for me." Dr. Sherwood smiled. "I'm sure he would. He's so..." She glanced at Johnny's sleeping face. "...sweet. Must be a real pleasure to work with."

"Yeah, he's a pleasure all right."

**Chapter Ten**

"Roy? Where are we?"

"The dentist."

"Oh, yeah?"

"Yeah. She took care of the cavity, and now I'm gonna take you home."

"Oookay."

"Come on, get up." Roy tried to help Johnny stand, but he pulled away.

"I can do it." Roy rolled his eyes and folded his arms. "Fine, go ahead."

Johnny tried to stand, lost his balance, and grabbed Roy for support. He grinned up at Roy as his knees buckled.

"Hi, Roy. What're you doin' here?"

"Taking you home."

"Oh, that's nice. Real nice."

"Yeah, real nice. Come on." They lurched a few steps toward the waiting room, Johnny's knees buckled again. "Whoa..."

"I got ya. Come on." Roy slung Johnny's arm around his shoulder and inched him forward. It was hard work, hauling Johnny's almost dead-weight.

"Roy..."

"Yeah?"

"Yer my best friend."

"Yeah, I know."

"I love ya, man. I really love ya."

"Uh huh."

"Not like I love chicks, ya know. I mean I love ya, but I LOVE chicks." Roy paused to shift Johnny's weight.

"Okay, okay. Shaddup, would ya?"

They passed Dr. Sherwood. She smiled and opened the door to the waiting room.

"It was lovely meeting you, John. Go home and take a nap."

"Oookay...ya wanna come take a nap with me?" Roy dug his fingers into Johnny's waist. Johnny was oblivious. Dr. Sherwood laughed. "You just let Roy take you home."

"Oookay. But I don't wanna take a nap with him." As they entered the waiting room, Johnny grinned. "She digs me."

"Johnny would ya - "

"Heya Gage, how ya doing, buddy?" Chet took Johnny's other arm and grinned up at him. "The dentist made it all better?" Roy glared at him, Johnny smiled.

"Chet, wanna see?" He leaned over Chet, opened his mouth, and lost his balance again. Chet shoved him back at Roy. "That's okay, Gage. I just came to give you a present. Here ya go." He shoved a bag of hard candy into Johnny's hands. Johnny stared at it stupidly. "For me?"

"All for you, Gage. Eat it in good health."

Roy reached around Johnny and gave Chet a shove. "Get away, Chet. Go on, scram!" Chet retired, guffawing, as Marco took Johnny's arm. "Johnny, I brought you a present. You can hang it from your rear view mirror. He dangled a fuzzy tooth in front of Johnny's face. Johnny watched it swing back and forth, back and forth. Marco hung it on Johnny's wrist. "Hope ya feel better."

"Gee, Marco...this is great." Johnny lost his balance and dropped into a chair. Roy held his head in his hands. "Look, just get it over with, would ya? I wanna go home!"

Mike placed a giant toothbrush in Johnny's lap. "It was Chet's idea. I'm outta here." He bolted from the office. Marco snickered. Chet rubbed his hands together. "Go on, Cap."

"You know, I think the point's been made. I'll just-"

"No, I wanna see!" Johnny reached for the item in Cap's hand. Cap shrugged and handed it to Johnny, who stared at it and handed it to Roy. "What is it?"

Roy glared at Cap. "It's a coloring book. 'Johnny Goes To The Dentist.'" Cap shifted uncomfortably. Johnny hauled himself to his feet and solemnly wrung Cap's hand. "Thanks, Cap."

"Okay, you've had your fun. Can you just help me get him in the car?" Cap, Marco and Chet helped Johnny walk unsteadily to Roy's car and settled him in the passenger seat. Johnny burst into tears. "You guys...are the best. Just...the best." He looked at Roy as the car roared to life. "Aren't they the best?"

Roy just shook his head as they drove away.

**Chapter Eleven**

Four hours later, Johnny awoke in his bed. His jaw ached. The bag of candy was on the nightstand, the toothbrush next to him, the coloring book in his lap. He was clutching the fuzzy tooth. He stared at everything for a moment, then his head hit the pillow again.

"Oh, man. You guys are gonna get it..." He sat up, ripped open the bag of candy, and popped one into his mouth. He pulled a piece of paper from his pocket and dialed a number.

"Hi, Dr. Sherwood, please. Hey, Dr Sherwood, it's John Gage. Yeah, the cavity. Much better. Listen, Doc...Carla...ya ever date a firefighter?"

THE END


End file.
